Gymkata

Release Date: 1985
Tagline: The skill of gymnastics, the kill of karate.

Director: Robert Clouse
Writers: Dan Tyler Moore (novel), Charles Robert Carner

Starring:
Kurt Thomas
Tetchie Agbayani
Richard Norton
John Barrett
Bob Schott
Buck Kartalian

Hall of Fame – Class of 2007

Plot Synopsis by Erik: The Granddaddy of Yakmala movies. The greatest so-bad-it’s-good movie ever made. Gymnastics champion Jonathan Cabot is recruited by a Bill-Bixbyish  Government Intelligence guy to travel to the tiny nation of Parmistan (or Par-MEE-stan, depending on who’s saying it) to compete in their national pastime, the Game. No outsider has  won the Game in five hundred years, including Cabot’s father. To lose the Game is, well, death. (No, really. I mean arrow through the heart, falling down into jagged rocks type death. A  bit more than just the agony of defeat.) To insure Cabot’s success, he is trained in a new technique blending the skills of the west and the martial arts of the east—GYMKATA! (Please  note: this word never appears in the film.) Once ready, he and the Rubali, princess of Parmistan, travel to Karabal, on the Capsian Sea, to receive final instructions from Mackle (they  call him “The Stork”). He betrays them, but Bill-Bixbyish/ David Birney guy comes to the rescue. At long last they arrive in Par-MEE-stan and are greeted by the Kahn, the, uh, king of  Parmistan. There Cabot must compete against challengers like Gomez, Hao, and Thorg before confronting the commie-loving Zamir and saving Parmistan, Rubali, and democracy. Pay  close attention to the national cheer of Par-MEE-stan.